Hostels are a mainstay in my travels. Every hostel is a little different but hostel etiquette is the one thing that doesn’t change. Here are 20 steps to help you become the most hated person in your hostel.
1. Select a bed with an owner. Take the bed you want. You know that bed next to the outlets. Throw the stuff that is already in the bed on another bed. The outlet bed is now yours. Then make sure to complain that they beds don’t match up to the sleep on latex pure green firm mattress review that you read on your way in or complain that their mattress isn’t as comfortable as a mattress from somewhere like Leesa.
2. Having trouble finding something in your backpack. Pull everything out of your pack and throw it all over the dorm room floor. No need to keep space available for others.
3. You have too much stuff in your pack to fit in one locker. Just use as many lockers as you need to lock up all your possessions. All your possessions are valuable and need to be protected.
4. Hungry? There is a fridge full of food. The fact that the food has labels identifying the owner is irrelevant. Your hunger trumps their ownership.
5. While making dinner use the free Wifi to download the latest episode of Game of Thrones.
6. Put your leftovers in a communal bowl. Put a name label on it and stick it in the fridge.
7. While cooking your gourmet dinner, make sure to use all the pots and burners in the kitchen.
8. Leave all the pots from your meal in the hostel kitchen. You’re a guest. If someone else wants to use the pots, they can clean the pots themselves.
9. Someone else has their phone plugged into an outlet. No problem, just unplug it. You need to plug in your phone.
10. There are only four outlets in your dorm room and you have to charge your laptop, cell phone, camera, and e-reader. Plug everything in and you’ll be good to go in the morning.
11. Oops, forgot one of your chargers. Simply “borrow” one that has been left plugged into an outlet. No one will notice that it’s gone.
12. The party doesn’t need to end when the bar closes. Bring those new friends back to the dorm room to keep the party going.
13. It’s 2 am and you need to find something in your bag. Turn on the overhead light. You paid for a bed in the room and that includes the light.
14. Too cheap for a private room. Having sex in the dorm room bed is possible.
15. Oops, I drank too much and got sick on the dorm room floor. Accidents happen.
16. Have an early morning flight. Be sure to turn on the overhead light and make lots of noise while packing to leave.
17. It’s early in the morning and you and your new buddy need to make plans for the day. The best way to do that is finish packing your bags while talking to each other loudly.
18. During your morning routine, enter and leave the door several times. Make sure it slams behind you each time.
19. Ring! Ring! It’s Mom calling. Answer your phone while you finish packing.
20. Don’t want to put your clean clothes on the floor while packing. The bunk next to yours is the perfect place to lay your things out.
**Please note: this piece is sarcastic. Please do not follow these steps in a hostel. These are all common situations that occur in hostels and should be avoided.
Don’t be afraid to share these steps with known hostel etiquette violators. Have you ever broken any hostel etiquette?
Feature Photo Credit: Ofer Deshe